My kid is INSANE....or is it me going insane?

Quite a hectic morning for me. Not because I had a lot to do, but because my boy apparently did. Here is how the first half hour of my morning went after Paul left for work. First, I gave Zander a bath and noticed that his finger and toe nails were getting long so I clipped them in a nice orderly pile. Out of the blue Zander looks down, grabs the pile of them, and shoves them into his mouth. Well I guess that meant breakfast was taken care of.

Next he wants his toothbrush. I'm thinking to myself, "I'm so glad he likes to brush his teeth!" As I'm entering my bedroom I hear SWISH SWISH SLURP. I peek at Zander and he is dipping his race car toothbrush into the toilet and proceeding to suck the toilet water out of it. Classy!

I thought these two events merited a text to Paul telling him how my morning was going. As I am texting, Zander proceeds to reach his arm into the child proof locked drawer and grabs my hot pink nail polish and runs into his bedroom (he's still completely naked mind you because I just got him out of the tub). I send my text and realize that he is creating hot pink art all over his face and body. So.....I grab him and throw him BACK into the tub (luckily he was still in the buff) and well, snapped a few pictures of course, and then gave him a scrubbing with nail polish remover. Any suggestions on how to get nail polish off teeth? Amazingly enough there wasn't a drop of nail polish anywhere but on his body. I think I'll call it a day.


I was trying to get him to show the nail polish on his top teeth, but was unfortunately unsuccessful.

15 comments:

motherofangels said...

Sooo funny!!!! I am glad you got pics!

The Elmers said...

How funny!! It must be in the air...Jameson grabbed my fave blood red nail polish this morning and dropped it...SHATTER, all over our bathroom tile/grout/his jeans/skin! Fun stuff!

Trout said...

That's crazy . . .

Your mom did the EXACT same thing this morning.

Freddie said...

Sounds like you have got your hands full. I remember when you lived with us and Zander was so quiet and sweet... .. ha-ha well guess he has changed.
You could try gasoline to get it off his teeth.

[Julie R] said...

oh jessica! I hope you aren't foretelling me what I have to deal with in 6 months :) I love the pic of him trying to show his teeth...it's so mischievous. And I think it's time you start sporting the hot pink nailpolish. rhhaaar!

Kenny, Jill and Aiden said...

My favorite is that he ate the fingernails! I can't get over how cute he is!

Annica said...

Haha, sounds like quite a morning!

THE FAMILY OF OAK said...

HA that is terrible, but he is so cute and I love that you took pics. I guess you can just be grateful that he didn't get it all over your carpet, furniture, etc. Here's to a better day...and a better breakfast:)

Traci said...

Oh I absolutely love these stories! Good thing Zander is so cute! Lunch was a blast. We still getting together Friday?

Kalli said...

oh man that is hilarious I was throwing up at the toilet toothbrush part but I am a bit of a germaphobe I think I may have wanted to clorox his mouth out (but I wouldn't have) anyways it always happens all the same day so beware next time I think I may need to knock on wood now just so I didn't jinx myself

billiebrand said...

is this what quiet babies turn into>> oh no im scared!!!!

The Allred Family said...

hilarious. A day in the life of ....a mother! :)

Amanda J said...

That is so funny! I like your Zander, he sounds like he is so much fun :)

The Haynie Family said...

He is definately related to Peyton! Oh and no suggestions how to get off the nail polish. I usually just wait for it to wear off after scrubbing her skin raw with polish remover!

Beans Blog said...

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA Im dying. Trouts comments kill me! Who is trout? HAHAHHAAHHA...And to heck with paint chips! When he is a freak all grown up people can wonder if he huffed too many nail polish fumes. And then you can tell them who his dad is and everything will make sense. And then Peyton and him can destroy the world together. Nail clippings and nail polish for breakfast...mmmm. My kind of treat. I wonder if he connected the two.